Monday, December 28, 2015

new year, new blog.

A picture from New Year's 2015. We were in Key West. There were lots of daiquiris and no babies!
I love Christmas, but New Years Day might be my favorite holiday. Ever since I was a kid, I've always given New Years the pomp and ceremony I think it deserves. When I was young, I used to start a new journal every year and stay up until midnight to watch Dick Clark's Rockin' New Years Eve, and then I'd lay in bed and write my first entry of the new year. I'd recap my year and write out my resolutions for the coming year and I'd wake up the next morning feeling energized by the possibility of a whole new year ahead of me. 

I haven't changed much. I still get giddy at the blank canvas of a new year; all the promise and hope of a new beginningI still think New Year's Eve is magical and sleeping through the countdown to midnight is an absolute cardinal sin in my book. 


And in the spirit of the new year and new beginnings, I'm making some changes to the blog. I love this little corner of the internet so much and I love sharing my joy and my heartache and my silly stories. What started out as a way to keep family and friends updated about our life as we moved from home and started out military life has grown into a place where I can share a little bit of my heart. (And every warm response to one of my posts has meant the world to me. Thank you!)

So I'm putting the blog under construction this week and by New Year's Day, I hope to have her back up and running. Not only will I have a new look, but a new name as well! And in anticipation of the blog's fresh look, the song below is a little clue about the new name. 

I hope your holidays are full of joy and you close out 2015 with the people you love most. I'll see you all in 2016!


Friday, December 18, 2015

just google it.



There is nothing like being a new parent to show you how little you know. And there is nothing like the one two punch of sleep deprivation and the neediness of a newborn to make every new inquiry feel like the most important conundrum. Which is why my Google search bar is getting the workout of it's life right now. Pretty much since the day after Eva was born, every time I'm perplexed anew, I pick up my trusty phone and look to the magic of the interwebs to solve the newest mystery. 

I am thankful that the collective knowledge of moms and dads from across the globe can be accessed from my couch at 3am and I make full use of it. There is no concern too silly, no query too odd, no question too obvious for the internet. The relief I feel when I start to type my question into that search bar and I see that someone, somewhere has asked the same thing is a wonderful feeling. 

And it's a good thing, because I Google everything lately. Here are some of my actual searches from the last seven weeks. These are Google searches made in all manner of desperation and confusion at all hours of the day and night. 

Is it normal for baby to need to be held 24/7?
Spoiler alert: Yes.

Does Starbucks deliver in Jacksonville 
Spoiler alert: No. 

Will my baby ever space out feedings?

Can you get pregnant while breastfeeding?
When I discovered that the answer was yes, it led to the next search...

Irish twins pros and cons
...which led to the next search...

Birth control while breastfeeding

There's also a few odd searches, because let's face it, babies are perplexing.
Umbilical cord stump whats normal
How to clean breast milk from clothes
How to clean breast milk from couch 
Baby screams when I put lotion on
Winnie the pooh themed wedding 
(I can't explain this last one. I guess I was just curious in the middle of the night if this was something people did. Spoiler alert: It is.)

And searches that are entirely more practical.
Okay to drink coffee and breastfeed
Okay to drink wine and breastfeed
How many glasses of wine 

The internet has a lot of helpful tips, but sometimes the best advice is from the people I trust most. 


Friday, December 4, 2015

one month down.


My favorite things:
  • Sleeping all curled up on someone's chest. 
  • Car rides. 
  • Watching football with Dad. At least I think I'm watching football. I honestly have no idea what I'm looking at, but it's bright and it moves and I like that. 
  • It's a tie between waiting until my Mom has got me all dressed and then pooping my diaper or waiting until my parents have got all comfy in bed, then spitting my paci out and crying. These are my two favorite pastimes.  
My least favorite things: 
  • Going more than two hours without a meal. 
  • Being set down.
Eva is one month old! We're celebrating with a beer because one month ago, I was sure I'd made a terrible mistake and I was sure that delivering a baby and then attempting to keep that baby alive would be the death of me. But it wasn't! I'm still here, R and I are still married, and our kid is still alive and thriving! Success all around! 

It's been a life changing month to say the least. I would be lying if I said I enjoyed every minute of it. A month ago I thought motherhood would sweep over me in the moments after delivery, those flushed and exhausted moments when I got to hold my baby for the first time and I'd look at R and we'd look at our daughter and we'd be different because now we were parents. That's not quite how the fairy tale went. Mostly I spent the first week in a kind of exhuastion I did not know was humanely possible. I basically cried as much as my baby did and I spent long hours in the dark of night wondering why I thought having a kid was a good idea. 

Then I started being able to function on less sleep and I showered and actually went out in the sunshine and things started looking up. 

And now, one month later, I'm starting to feel like a mom. I don't freak out when she cries. I can nurse her in public without completely stressing out. I can still have intelligent conversations on only a few measly hours of sleep. I don't have it all figured out by any means, but each day, I find that I learn something new about Eva and something new about myself and I feel a little more confident to take on the next day. 

So here's to one month of parenting and one month of life for our sweet Eva! Here's a little bit of what we've been up to this month: 

First family selfie!

Her first outing was to a homebrew competition! She wore an Intuition Brewery onesie that says "Assistant Brewer" over the pocket. She was a huge hit with the brewer crowd! 

Her second outing was to Mom's favorite place in the world...

Baby's first brunch!

A pedi with Mom and Nana. 
She dressed up in her best turkey outfit for a Thanksgiving with lots of love around the table.

She also dressed appropriately to root for her favorite team! 

Meeting Grandma and Grandpa for the very first time!

Getting all the love and attention from Auntie Andrea and Uncle Brad. 

Snuggling with her big brother. Hearts in my eyes!