Friday, July 24, 2015

six years: an open letter to my husband

Dear R, 

Today we've been married six years. I think back on the eve of our wedding six years ago. My girlfriends slept over at my apartment after the rehearsal dinner and made me a cake that said "Happy Night Before Your Wedding!" and we laughed and talked late into the night. We were the first of our group to get married and it felt like we had crossed the threshold into adulthood. I know now that getting married doesn't make you any more adult than learning to drive or being able to vote. It's the being married that's grown us. 

Now, six years later, you're in the office and your music is playing softly and my growing belly is full of fingers and toes that we created together and I feel content in our marriage in a way I couldn't have anticipated when I excitedly ate cake and talked about the future with my best girls that night six years ago. I thought marriage would fill me up and complete me, but what it's done is soften and humble me. It's taught me more about Jesus and grace than a thousand sermons ever could and I am thankful to learn those lessons with you. 

Being married to you is my favorite thing I've ever done. I am proud to be your wife. I am proud that you're my husband. I knew you were a good man when I held my finger out for you to slip on a ring, but I couldn't have ever known just how good you would be for me. You are even keeled and you are solid ground for me. You are well balanced and I crave your brand of strength. Most importantly, you are home to me. Where you are is where I feel safe and where I make sense of my world. I've become the woman I am because you give me space to grow upwards and outwards and you love me just the same no matter what. Thank you for that. And the icing on top is that you and I share a secret language and a secret humor that is uniquely ours. You can make me laugh like no one else can and I get to see a side of you that you share only with me. After six years and four moves and thousands of miles from where we first said I do, what we've created between us is more special to me than ever before. 

So here's to the last six years. Here's to however many more years we're lucky to have ahead of us. Here's to the next big chapter and the unknowns that lie foggy ahead and here's to the things that we have figured out so far. Happy Anniversary!

Your Wife


  1. This post is filled with so much love. It totally made me cry. Happy Anniversary to my favorite high school sweethearts! I hope you're celebrating with funfetti.

  2. Cari you are amazing and a beautiful and talented writer. Keep it coming!! I wish more people would understand getting married and being married are not the same.

  3. (applause)